Thursday, April 9, 2015

Parallel Parking Doom

I always have this fear that not only will I be incapable of parallel parking but it will also cause some sort of road rage incident if I even try.  I picture some crazy person getting out of their car with a tire iron or something to smash my car to bits if I don't perfectly park on the first attempt.

ONE MUST ACHIEVE PERFECTION OR ALL IS LOST!!!!  People will rage, the earth shall split asunder, I will be judged harshly for my lack of parallel parking prowess!!!!

As a result, normally I completely forgo parallel parking and look for spaces that I can just pull into head first.  Yeah, I'm chickenshit.  There I said it.

I have a small car.  It's great for that.  I love my car.  But in a purely platonic way...just sayin'...

So today I'm off to an appointment and the only space I could find was a parallel parking space AND there's a truck behind me.  HOLY SHIT I'm gonna die if I try this, I just know it.  And the guy in the truck is going to honk at me and tell me off for  holding him up if I try it.  That's what I'm thinking.

I know, I know, you must be thinking, "why does she care what the guy in the truck is going to think or do?"  And you would be right to think that.

BUT I'M NOT RATIONAL plus I've got a nice big fat anxiety disorder which makes everything feel like a life or death situation.

You know what though?  I took a deep breath, put my blinker on, motioned the truck to pass me, and I parallel parked my Mandie-mobile perfectly on my first attempt.


Sure it took me 2 frikken tries to back out of the driveway without hitting a tree but parallel parking is my bitch today.

I'm owning that shit.

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